Actions Speak Louder than Words

I have finally understood why men are so eager to convince women of their qualities as a partner. Men have observed two things: that women have lists with items to check off, and that women can be talked out of being serious about those lists. So here is the thing: there is a list forContinue reading “Actions Speak Louder than Words”

One On One

The attempt to make everyone happy stems from a desire for love. Ironically, people pleasers almost never get the love they seek and hardly any individual attention or one-on-one interest. The reaction from outside mirrors how they operate: not from their own values, but from the value of gaining wide approval. It is when youContinue reading “One On One”

Answer to “How Narcissists Play Games to Seduce and Abandon You”, by Darlene Lancer

Darlene Lancer wrote a great article in 2019 on Medium. I recommend it. https://medium.com/narcissism-and-abusive-relationships/how-narcissists-play-games-to-seduce-and-abandon-you-63e115309552 I replied in two parts on Medium and want to add it to this page, because I am seeing intense interest in my darker writings, especially in regards to how we can approach, cope with, and recognize narcissists or other character-disorderedContinue reading “Answer to “How Narcissists Play Games to Seduce and Abandon You”, by Darlene Lancer”

Full Self-Acceptance vs. Perpetual Transformation

Constant transformation can be an addiction too. About eight years ago, I had the hunch that self-hate and the resistance to accept themselves is what turned people, and a whole culture (North America and the new age community, for example), into transformation junkies. It is great to change for the better, to upgrade your style,Continue reading “Full Self-Acceptance vs. Perpetual Transformation”

Disconnect From Aversion. Connect with Inspiration.

The obsession with The Bad Guy kills, or warps, solution-oriented thinking. You can notice that in politics, in private life, in the way society or a community organizes itself… and in all the glorious ways a person lets go of self-sabotage and starts living. The more energy you spend on a destructive personality who willContinue reading “Disconnect From Aversion. Connect with Inspiration.”