Your best relationships are not with the people who impact you (or cut) the deepest or who make you feel the most useful, but the bonds that are the FRIENDLIEST.
Being taught “stuff” or being the one to teach “stuff” and the grave feelings of being useful and on purpose only go so far.
Love is without agenda. It does not demand a completely different emotional make-up and major shifts in consciousness. It accepts. It celebrates differences and complimentary traits, even adores that. And, love is silly!
Relaxed relationships carry the greatest love within them.
If you think of creating a delicious and lasting relationship, this content is for you:
Observe the people you want to get to know better.
A pugnacious personality should be given the opportunity to find someone who suits his (or her) temperament. So both parties can feel successful, while they clean up their styles, in tandem.
Do not expect too much too soon.
Be realistic. About yourself first. Since you understand yourself best and better than any other person you are only beginning to know. Be realistic about your expectations too.
Expectations: you don’t see them, until they come raining down on us, as they must. 😄
For example, how long can you wait for an overhaul of habits, or of mentality? Would you not prefer having zero expectations about a transformation? How much more peaceful is that?
To a lover type, a sattvic personality who sets a high tone of love in his community is a good match. He (she) has more of the “right” traits to be a partner too.
The law of attraction has been delivering to you harmonious and compatible energies – through your closest friends. Likely for a long time too. Ask yourself which of their qualities you would appreciate in a partner.
If you aim for a love-based relationship, identify what you like so much. Then imagine a partner with those traits and how much you would like him.
Stay centred in that.
It is amazing – though predictable – how fast this brings to you decent people who are on the same wave length and weeds out those who are not.
To wrap up the initial point, a preference for intensity in relationships could indicate a hurt inner child.
It is better to go into therapy for it than to use relationships as a therapy.
When you have discovered your path in other areas of your life, you definitely prefer a much lighter relationship, a bond that is healthy, where the Masculine and the Feminine are in proportion and support each other. Conversations with nothing to prove to each other, and drama, disgusting associations or behaviours under control. A helpful partner – you know.
Though rare these days, that is all the more appreciated.
NJ,
24 July 2015
#friendlylove – I dig it.
Nanda Jurela 